The synopsis of biblical leaders (from the evangelical canon)

The snake, metaphorical or not, apparently rebelled against God (if this was Satan).
Eve, duped by the snake, disobeys God.
Adam, duped by Eve, disobeys God.
Cain kills Abel.
All are punished accordingly.
The snake loses his natural born right to walk.
Eve loses her natural born right not to feel pain during child birth.
Adam has to feel the pain of tilling the ground for his food. No more easy picking fruit for him.
God places some visible mark on Cain that tells people not to kill him. Oh and he had to move out of the land. God had to make sure the punishment fit the crime.

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Noah, gets friggin drunk to the point where he passes out naked, and one of his sons laughs at him and tells his brothers. Well, Noah doesn't get punished but Ham sure as hell did. Hello curse! Great curse.... more about that later.

Babel people. Man they really messed up. They were devising a way to have a universal language. Bad idea peeps. God don't like it when people can apparently communicate with one another..... it could mean they would accomplish anything they set their hearts and minds to.

Abram lies to the pharaoh about Sarai being his sister. Pharaoh gets cursed because he likes Sarai.

So lets recap.
Noah gets drunk.... no punishment. Shem mocks him.... gets cursed.
Babel people build city and universal language and they get punished. Dispersement with new languages.
Abram lies and Pharaoh gets cursed. Holy shit. Lesson? We will get to that later.

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Abram is given a maidservant by his wife. Gotta love a wife like that! He only did it to have a child. (I am sure he didn't enjoy any of it. Dreadful experience.)

Sarai hates her maidservant and starts beating her. The maidservant runs away with Ishmael (Abrams son).

Sarai laughs at God when God tells her she will have a baby at 90. He confronts her. She lies.

Sodom and Gomorrah. Well, they treated people poorly. Result? Nuke. Well, something similar to a nuke anyway. God played etch a sketch.

Lot was going to let the townspeople rape his daughters. Nice gesture. The townspeople wanted some other type of 'sex' apparently.

Lots wife, well she turned around, when God told her not to look back. Pillar of salt. She was the wanker who turned around.

Recap.

Abram has sex with his maidservant, with the permission of his wife. No punishment.
Sarai, beats on her maidserverant. No punishment.
Ishmael, the son, is blessed/cursed by God? He will be at war all the time.
Sarai lies to God. No punishment.
Sodom. Well, come on, they got what they had coming. Don't give to the poor. Get rained on by fire.
I guess its okay to offer your daughters as sex slaves. No punishment.
Lots wife. Reminds me of an old story. Eve perhaps? Will women never learn? It's like adding salt to the wound.... owie!

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Lot, well he gets drunk one night and is so drunk that he can't recognize that his daughters
are the ones arousing his genetalia. He has sex with them.... both.... at 2 different x's. Ummm.....can we say.... what the hell?

Abram (now Abraham), has a prepencity for lying to Pharaohs about his wife. Guess what...the jackass did it again! Guess who got punished!? Does that make Abraham an asshole?

Sarai (now Sarah) tells Abraham to boot out Hagar and Ishmael. He does. Poor treatment of another human being comes to mind right about now.

Recap.

Incest and drunkeness. No punishement. For either time.
Can we say.... the wrong person keeps getting cursed? Abraham... loves a good prank!
Okay.... Sodom and Gomorah.... etch a sketch..... Sarah..... ......... ........... cough cough....... .......

Let's skip onto some other ones.

Isaac, Rebekah, Jacob and Esau, and Laban. Oh my god. Let's just call this story the day God stood still.
Samson. Has sex before marriage...lol. Kills dozens of people.

Elijah. Death to many prophets by fire.
Elisha. Some kids call him baldy. Death to kids who call men baldies!!!

Joseph is a messianic archetype so he does nothing wrong. Daniel is the same thing. Presented as perfect people. And then Jesus of Nazareth also presented as perfect.

Job.... too self involved... thinking he knows better then God. Errr..... hold on here.... didn't God make a cosmic bet with Satan to let Satan do anything with Job? Really? And we are okay with that? We are subject to God betting?

Moses. Oh good ol Moses. That poor bastard. Wandered around in a desert for 40 years because he didn't do something right. Well, he did murder someone but he didnt get punished by God for that. Unless tending sheep for a couple decades , meeting your wife and having kids, is punishment.

But get this... Moses hits the rock more times then what God stated (the adam eve thing again) and he doesn't get to go into the promised land that he had been wandering in the desert to get to for 40 years!!!!!

The Israelites or Mosites worship a gold statue. God opens the earth and kills half of them.

David. Sex, sex, and errrr more sex. Oh then lying. Cause it wasn't just sex... it was adultery. Oh and it wasn't just lying.... it then became murdering her husband. Punishment? His unborn child....dies. Sigh.

Solomon....considered the wisest man to ever live. And he got drunk, slept with prostitutes, wasted money, partied, had endless amounts of sex with hundreds of wives concubines and others. Worshipped other Gods. Punishment? Ya none.

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So.....what are the lessons? I have no idea. It all seems like friggin chaos to me. Some people get punished for eating a fruit. Others get punished for hitting a rock. And then some people can friggin do almost the most criminal things imaginable with no God punishment. OR people can do horrid things but then others get punished because of their actions. That is a friggin pisser.

What I do find interesting is that the Israelites were going into kill the Canannites, who were their relatives and that this was a blessed action by God. Remember the curse on Ham? Ham was the father of Canaan. Well guess the curse is coming to fruition. Cause the Sons of Israel are coming to wipe out their cousins.

Anyway, the problems abound as I work through the weight of information that appears conflicting.

BUT to my main point for writing this. What I do find interesting is how Christians (not all but many in my circles) with the legacy, just presented, can stand in judgement of others when they make bad choices in life. All there leaders minus a few exceptions ie the fabled stories are 'fucked up'. They all made mistakes that were horendous.

The greatest problem with evangelical christians is the arrogance of thinking they are better then everyone else (including those amongst them who make bad choices in life). And sadly this has been taught considerably by the modernist who taught that they had the corner on the truth. For example, the bible is perfect. We have the perfect interpretation of the bible. Therefore we are perfect in our thinking and can judge people accordingly.

Every day I watch as people judge me for my bad choices in life, even though I have taken the steps to rectify my bad choices, made amends, etc. I watch as they talk to me, now, as if I am inferior to them. I see the disgust, the disdain, the arrogance, in their eyes, their gestures, their words. It almost becomes debilitating.

Some days you feel like killing yourself. Other days you feel like killing them. And some days you can live in the 'now' and move on. And still somedays I imagine myself preaching to them lambasting them for their arrogance.

I wish at times that I could just sit in a rustic coffee shop with people who wanted to talk about life, love, god, philosophy etc. while I sip on a coffee, laughing, crying, hoping, remembering, or simply quiet and listening.

Instead, I sit with pain, feeling judgment, being made to feel less then nothing, unsure of how to step away from the feelings. I know that thoughts are generated by the 'I' but the I is being influenced by the christian media of judgment right now. I need to figure out how to stop allowing the media to infiltrate the I or to filter it so the I is able to produce thoughts that are good. The thoughts I am having now are eating away at me. They are severing my connection to the 'WE' or to the god collective or whatever it is lol.

I guess in some ways what this is teaching me is that I was grossly dependant upon corporate religion in the same way that I am dependant on corporate oil, energy and agriculture. I must free myself of all these. I must tread a new path and build a new network based on love and not religion. I must build relationships that are fostered on a commitment to love not on a commitment to a denomination or faith group. To put dependance in a faith group forces a person to make decisions that may go contrary to their value systems if they wish to be supported and helped by that faith group. This is unhealthy and foolish.


Perhaps I will write more later.